Here's the Scoop: Jan. 6, 2010
Warm and cuddly feeling
When a recent conversation came around to Snuggies, I felt left out. Finally, I casually asked: “What exactly is a Snuggie?” I didn’t receive an immediate answer, but there were plenty of skeptical stares from the small group assembled. No one present, it seems, believed that I didn’t know about the wonders of Snuggies.
With half-a-dozen people gazing at me, I finally cracked.
“OK, I kind of remember that Snuggie is that cute little bear in the fabric softener commercials from back in the ’80s,” I blurted out. “So what?”
The cute little bear, I was politely informed, was called Snuggle.
“I’ve got nothing else. I have no idea what a Snuggie is,” I responded truthfully.
I was then questioned about my late-night TV viewing habits. After a few more minutes, I was able to convince the group that I had somehow managed to avoid what apparently amounts to an extraordinary amount of TV commercials touting the greatness of a Snuggie.
“Wow!” my wife exclaimed. “You think you know someone. My sister said the only thing she wanted for Christmas was a Snuggie.”
Even though I still had no idea of whether a Snuggie was something to be played with, worn or eaten, I good-naturedly asked if my sister-in-law had indeed been Snuggified (my word) on Christmas morning?
It seems she had. And she was a better person as a result of this apparent act of kindness.
Well, at the very least she was a warmer human being after having received this gift. If there’s anyone out there who is late to the Snuggifest (my term again — I’m in the process of having it trademarked), it seems the easiest way to describe this phenomenon is a “sleeved blanket.” Interesting. I wonder if they have a vest version?
I didn’t give the Snuggie much more thought until a few days later when I was browsing Consumer Reports and there, in living color, was a Snuggie. At least that’s what the story said I was looking at. When I first saw the image of a woman adorned in a Snuggie, I thought I was staring at a human candle — with sort of a blue, flowing wax. But no, it was my first Snuggie sighting!
Even Consumer Reports apparently couldn’t believe that I was a Snug-irgin (someone who has never discovered the virtues of a Snuggie). The magazine described this product as “the ubiquitous sleeved blanket that has been lampooned everywhere.” Wait a minute. It hasn’t been lampooned here. At least not fully. Yet.
For those who missed the Consumer Reports review, here are some highlights: “The Snuggie sheds a sandwich bag’s worth of lint from each drying cycle.” Plus, after 10 loads, the Snuggie “had bare spots between clumps and pills.” That can’t be good. Maybe they could change the name to the Mangy?
The magazine also stated that “Many of the 11 staffers who wore the Snuggie had trouble walking (maybe they were wearing high heels?) and smaller people found its sleeves too long.” That could make Snuggling difficult.
In conclusion, the magazine stated that, “Several staffers said the Snuggie left their backside uncovered, so that it felt like a hospital gown.” No wonder it’s the butt of so many jokes.